Best computer question I've heard lately: How do I set my laser printer to stun?
OK, it's a joke, but as we head into another Christmas shopping season full of computer hype and hoopla, it illustrates an important point:
Who knows how to fix this computer stuff?
Imagine you purchased a new $20,000 car and had to open the hood and tinker with the engine every time you wanted to go somewhere new. Imagine the car also had a bad habit of stopping dead in the road. When you went back to the dealer to complain, he told you to call an 800-number (or even worse, a charge-by-the-minute 900-number) for ''support.''
I don't need support, you'd scream, I need repair!
There was a time when cars were like this: about 80 years ago. At the dawn of the Automobile Age, unreliable cars were sold to hobbyists and ''enthusiasts'' who were willing to manually advance the spark and crank the engine just for a trip into town.
So let's accept some basic facts: We're still at the dawn of the computer age. Despite the hype about computers and the Internet, they're not as reliable as, say, a TV set with cable. We're going to have to tinker occasionally. We're going to have to learn to do basic maintenance.
Start on the Net
One good place to start is the World Wide Web, where many Web sites offer articles, search engines and e-mail services to help befuddled users.
Both Microsoft and Apple offer excellent technical support libraries. The Microsoft Knowledge Base, a database of articles and answers to common questions, can be easily searched from the Web site http://www.microsoft.com/kb/default.asp. There's also a Troubleshooting Wizard, which asks a series of standard questions to help you solve basic problems. And a place where you can e-mail questions to a support person.
The Apple Get Info site http://www.info.apple.com has a Tech Support Online area, which, while not as advanced as the Microsoft site, does offer a searchable database of technical articles http://til.info.apple.com.
And many companies that sell hardware and software maintain Web sites that offer, at the very least, a list of Frequently Asked Questions and a link to send e-mail to the support mailbox.
More advanced users (and those wishing to be) can stop by TechWeb http://www.techweb.com, a site run by CMP Media, which publishes several computer magazines (Windows, HomePC, InternetWeek and InformationWeek to name a few). The TechEncyclopedia area offers definitions of 10,000 technology terms, and a searchable archive contains articles from CMP publications.
You won't get answers to basic questions, but you can find out what ''Active-X'' and ''56Kflex'' mean.
A similar site is maintained by Ziff-Davis, which publishes most of the mainstream computer magazines. ZDNet http://www.zdnet.com has a searchable archive of past articles and a large shareware/freeware software repository.
Catalog of help
If you'd rather just call someone and yell, you can find a catalog of technical support for computer companies at PC Help Online http://www.pchelponline.com.
Software.Net, a site that sells download versions of popular software, maintains a similar database of software vendors http://www.software.net/directory.htm.
SupportHelp.com http://www.supporthelp.com claims to have the largest database of computer companies in a searchable database http://www.supporthelp.com.
If you're in a total quandary, you can exchange e-mail with a group of computer experts at NoWonder Computer Support http://www.nowonder.com. Ask a question, and this site promises an e-mail response within 24 hours. It also offers a wide range of expertise: not only Mac and PC, but also Unix, OS2, HTML - even the Be operating system.
E-mail Charles Brewer with questions, comments and suggestions at CBrewer@enquirer.com Charles Brewer's columns can be found at http://enquirer.com/columns/brewer