This spring, Ohio University students rioted in the streets and fought with police because bars closed an hour early for Daylight Savings Time. Meanwhile, Ohio's university presidents toured the state, staging sit-ins to whine about "cuts" that actually increase state spending by hundreds of millions.
Campus protests ain't what they used to be. Neither is a college education. Students don't know how many Buds it takes to "spring ahead" one-hour - and university presidents don't know champagne demands from six-pack reality.
"We want our fair share and we haven't had our fair share in a long time," said University President Joseph Steger.
Miami University President James Garland said, "Graduation rates of 50 percent or less are no secret." The answer: more money. University of Kentucky President Charles Wethington scorned Gov. Paul Patton for offering only a $100 million bonus to pry community colleges from UK's white-knuckle grip.
And Ohio State University President E. Gordon Gee says the cost of college has been overestimated. At an Ohio average of $3,767, he insists, "Our public colleges and universities are one of the best buys around."
I hate to burst their Korbel bubbles, but their gripes are just near-beer.
Averaged over the past decade, Ohio funding has stayed well ahead of inflation: 3.9 percent vs. 3.2 percent (Consumer Price Index). That "fair share" keeps 67 campuses No. 3 in spending, behind welfare and public schools.
The decline in value of a college diploma is something the campus crowd doesn't discuss - especially while Ohio tuition rose 200 percent from 1980-95, compared to 79 percent for the CPI.
Dr. Gee's "best buy" doesn't include room and board, books, fees and supplies, which push the average cost for one year at an Ohio public college to $10,500. That's a bargain compared to private Ivy League prices of $28,000 per year - but still enough to give most families 10,500 volts of sticker shock.
Dr. Wethington's salary is a state secret at UK. Maybe that's because he makes twice as much as the governor - $179,846, compared to $93,904.
For the record: Miami pays Dr. Garland $195,000, plus housing, a car and an additional 27 percent ($52,650) in fringes. At UC, Dr. Steger is paid $250,000, plus a house, car and fringes. OSU pays Dr. Gee $231,000, plus a home, two cars and $39,000 in benefits. Gov. George Voinovich: $115,000.
All four presidents are very articulate, intelligent and effective advocates for higher education. They are CEOs of a weird world of invisible professors, science-fiction research, untouchable coaching gods, comic-book classes and students who major in substance abuse. Just trying to rename a mascot can be a catastrophic career crisis in Campusland.
I've been studying higher ed. Here's a Cliff's Notes summary: At UC, there is one employee for every four students. Enrollment has been flat for five years, but tuition doubled in 10 years and quadrupled since 1979.
Typical among universities, UC gives free tuition as a job perk - to even the highest paid employees. Last fall, free tuition went to 2,369 employees, spouses and dependents. Most (651) were in the top salary rank, administrative-professional, followed by staff and faculty. Average full professor salary: $68,000. UC has the nation's 11th largest endowment among public universities: $563 million. Five percent is tapped each year - compared to investment earnings of 17 percent last year.
Nationwide, subsidies like President Clinton's tuition-tax cuts are raising college costs and turning universities into "K-16" branches of public schools, where degrees are an entitlement. Some degrees are already no better than a high school diploma of 20 years ago.
And the value is slipping. There are 1 million unemployed Ph.D.'s; over 10 years, the average student loan has increased 70 percent, while the average starting salary for graduates has risen just 6 percent since 1980. The average college work week for students is at an all-time low: 29 hours, compared to 60 hours in the early '60s. And about half of students' face-to-face contacts are with real professors - the rest are with the migrant workers of higher education, teaching assistants.
In Bright College Years, former New York Times reporter Anne Matthews describes colleges so cash-greedy they will take anyone "with a pulse in one hand and a check in the other."
"Higher education is the last great American institution, except for presidential campaigns, to dodge systemic downsizing and reform," she writes. While health care, the military, even Congress have changed, "The campus world claims privilege, resists accountability, fights limits of any kind."
Students riot for beer. Pampered presidents cry dollar-sign tears.
It's enough to make double-mortgaged parents squeeze into bellbottom jeans and march in middle-aged campus protests:
"Hell no, we won't go - for higher tuition."
Peter Bronson is editorial page editor of The Enquirer. If you have questions or comments, call 768-8301, or write to 312 Elm Street, Cincinnati, Ohio 45202.
BRONSON ARCHIVE
