BY SUE MacDONALD
The Cincinnati Enquirer

Teachers and counselors set aside extra time Friday to talk, listen and answer questions from students at Summit Country Day School in Hyde Park.

Dexter Adams, the father of an 8-year-old Summit student Ayrenne Adams, was one of 29 people killed in the Thursday crash of Comair Flight 3272 near Detroit. Ayrenne Adams did not go to school on Friday.

Clare King, director of Summit's Primary School, said campus ministers, counselors and staff members from Fernside Center for Grieving Children in Norwood were called in Friday to be available to children.

When children hear bad news about someone else's parents, they tend to focus on their own families, said Edward Tyrrell, headmaster of Summit Country Day School. ''They have questions like, 'My daddy's going to be flying on a plane, will he be OK?'Ç''

Children react differently to news of disasters, say child-psychology experts. Parents can play important roles by answering children's questions and validating their feelings.

''A crisis is always an opportunity for parents to keep communication open,'' said Joan Van Epps, assistant director of child and family services at NORCEN Behavioral Health Services, Roselawn. ''One of the most important things is for parents to listen.''

Sometimes children may be scared or worried. Sometimes a disaster may trigger other issues, such as loss of recent contact with a grandparent or worries about a parent's frequent business trips.

''If parents are open to listening and hearing what the child has to say, it will give them an opportunity to find out more about what the child is feeling,'' she said.

Paying attention to behaviors, reactions and comments will give clues to children's fears, said Cincinnati child psychologist James Brush.

''It doesn't help to finesse things or say, 'Oh, things will be all right,' or 'These things will never happen to you,' '' Mr. Brush says. Instead, acknowledge that bad, frightening or worrisome things sometimes happen - and also reassure children that adults work hard to make the world safe and take care of people affected by misfortune, he said.

''It's really, really important to listen to kids and validate their experience,'' Ms. Van Epps said. ''Kids will be worried. It's important to say, 'Yeah, that is a worrisome thing,' rather than saying, 'Don't worry.'Ç''

Mr. Brush said older children can understand factual explanations. It might help to tell a child that thousands of airplanes take off and land safely each day, while crashes get attention because they are rare.

''And if you don't have answers, it's OK to say so,'' Ms. Van Epps said.

''If the kids are asking why, it's OK to say, 'We don't always know why.' ''

CRASH
FAMILIES
CREW
MINISTER
SCENE
INVESTIGATION
TRAVELERS
INVESTORS
TODAY'S SUMMARY

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FIRST-DAY COVERAGE Jan. 10, 1997

Victims

First Officer
Kenneth Reece

Flight Attendant
Darinda Ogden

PASSENGERS
Adams, Dexter
Cincinnati

Barrow, Gregory
Detroit

Bransford, Roger
Atlanta

Brice, Arthur
Brookhaven, Miss.

Brownlee, Christine
Helena, Mont.

Brownlee, Scott
Helena, Mont.

Davis, Geoffrey
Detroit.

DeMarco, Maureen
Englewood, Colo.

Douchard, Greg
Brookhaven, Miss.

Felteau, Leo
Atlanta

Herman, Mark
Detroit

Jones, Betty Jean
Detroit

Jones, Charles
McComb, Miss.

McClain, Steven
Detroit

Muskovitz, Teri
Detroit

Passariello, Kim
Detroit

Raymond, Roy
Twin Falls, Id.

Raymond, Vernamarie
Twin Falls, Id.

Rosiak, Jennifer
Pensacola, Fla.

Rosiak, Nicholas
Pensacola, Fla.

Sharangpani, Arati
Colts Neck, N.J.

Stearn, Richard
Detroit

Takenami, Keita
Lexington, Ky.

Thomas, Douglas
Detroit.

Wansedel, Charles
Detroit

Zagar, Darlene
Danville, Ky.