Friday, August 13, 1999
RECONNECTING WITH TEENS
• Be real. Get out of denial and get informed. The world of regular adolescents is not what you expect.
• Be available. Most kids think their parents are available to them during the workday for life-threatening emergencies only. Let them know they can call if something important to them comes up. Just knowing you are there for them makes a big difference.
• Be involved. No matter what they say, kids like it when their parents show interest in what they are doing. Attend your child's activities. Make a date with your child. Volunteer to drive the carpool or take your kids wherever they need to go. Visit them in their space, but knock if their bedroom door is closed.
• Be the adult you are. Neither be intimidated, nor gullible. Set boundaries, and they will be secretly appreciated. Enforce curfews, but this means staying awake until the kids come home. If there is a party, call the house and see if the parents will be home. Don't buy the time-honored cover of a late-night decision to sleep over at a friend's house. Sleepovers need to be arranged before 10. You might want to check with the parents in those instances, too.
• Get to know each other. Communication is a two-way street. Share information about your day, your youth and your feelings. This is not to suggest parents bring their children in as their confidantes, but rather that they share their humanity.
• Network with other parents. Know the parents of their friends and communicate with each other. You might find that some have wildly different values than you do, but at least you will know.
• Create wholesome options. Ultimately the thing adolescents want most is to be with each other. If adults in the community are persistent in setting boundaries and diligent in orchestrating healthy, fun opportunities for kids to socialize, eventually new options can become popular. But involve kids in planning and be patient. It may take awhile to catch on.
• Hug them. If you've always had a warm connection to your child, don't drop it because they suddenly seem so big and grown up. Don't embarrass them by giving a huge smacker in front of their buddies, but a warm hug, an affectionate touch are reminders of how some things remain the same even when everything else is changing.
Source: Patricia Hersch
The secret world of America's teens
Reconnecting with teens
Closing the generation gap
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First test of sex offender law in place
Man identified as hit-skip driver
Pursuit of 'deadbeat' parents paying off
Covered walkways may lose roofs
Inmate can have abortion
Refusal to sell abortion pill meant firing, suit says
Use of gun would deny bail
Campbell's land valuator is indicted
No cause found for Florence fire
County prodded on hiring minorities on stadium
Cruisers prowl accident-prone I-71
Madisonville woman abducted, raped
New tests could speed E.coli detection
Number of E.coli cases rises
Pipe bomb discovered at construction site
Conan's sidekick says good night
Game creator not in it for money
GET TO IT
Lilith Fair loosens up
Marsalis tops reduced CAA season
'Riverdance' leaves audience breathless
Aronoff charged with DUI after crash at Statehouse
Child agency levy on ballot
Colerain proposes heftier road levy
CPS schools change schedules
Habitat finds home of its own
Hamilton refuses to join Butler in running airport
Judge dismisses Broadnax drug fine
Judge's arrival caps move to courthouse
Law director now deputy city manager
Lebanon may get assistant city attorney
Mayor goes back on Klan rally deal
Mayor threatens to pull critic off committee
Racism in police hiring alleged
Some avoid waterline assessment
Symmes official vows to protect turf
TRISTATE DIGEST
Truants will need doctor's note in Lebanon
Y2K plan angers city workers
