Friday, October 29, 1999
Culture a culprit in rape
Men told to look at attitude
BY SAUNDRA AMRHEIN and DIONNE BRADDIX
The Cincinnati Enquirer
Pepper spray, locked doors and alcohol consumption often dominate talks about rape prevention. But in the wake of a string of sexual assaults in northern suburbs, the focus shifted Thursday at a University of Cincinnati workshop — to men.
The workshop on rape prevention, culminating UC's Sexual Assault Awareness Week, dealt with what causes men to rape, and what they can do to stop it.
The role men play in rape, though seemingly obvious, is a relatively new area of discussion.
“This year, instead of focusing on what women can do to protect themselves, we focused on men taking responsibility,” said Andrea Scarpino-Prince, University of Cincinnati Women's Center programming coordinator. “It's not going to stop until men decide to make it stop.” The workshop Thursday included presentations by psychotherapist Jonathan Stillerman and Patrick Lemmon, co-directors of Washington D.C.-based Men's Rape Prevention Project.
The afternoon workshop involved about 40 faculty members, coaches and students.
“Every day we support a culture that allows rape to happen,” Mr. Lemmon said. “We believe men must step forward.” Men can do that by halting degrading comments about women or girlfriends and by not encouraging each other to take advantage of women who are vulnerable or intoxicated.
More than 90 percent of all sexual assaults are committed by men; more than 1 million women and girls are raped each year in the United States. In at least four of five cases, rapes occur between people who know each other, Mr. Lemmon said.
Dr. Stillerman and Mr. Lemmon asked the group to rank real-life situations on a continuum of harm to women. It included whistling at women, blaming a woman's revealing clothing for her rape, or telling boys they throw like girls.
Blaming a woman's rape on her clothing was deemed most harmful.
“It gives women a false sense of power, that you could have controlled it,” said Survi Parvatiyar, a 22-year-old graduate student.
Near the middle was the whistling or honking at a woman.
“It heightens the lack of safety and the sense of entitlement to a woman's space,” said graduate student Julie Duhigg, 26. Others in the group said it might be a sign of flirtation, or intended as a compliment that women use toward men as well.
Though ranked least harmful to women, the example of telling boys they throw like girls revealed the subtle nature of neg ative messages that could lead men to hurt women, group members said.
“It's definitely harmful because it's making a girl something you don't want to be,” said Thiago Winterstein, a 22-year-old student . “It's starting on the road to hating a part of yourself that is feminine.”
While the example brought up opinions on negative messages directed to female athletes, others said it did something worse.
“To me, it teaches the philosophy that girls are less than boys,” said Daniel Cummins, director of judicial affairs in the Department of Student Life. “It teaches boys who will be men that girls will always be less.”
But to UC head baseball coach Brian Cleary, society can't be blamed for rape.
“At some point, there's some per sonal responsibility involved,” he said. “I know these things contribute but I think it's very far away from turning a man into a rapist.”
Kim McGinnis-Hemphill, program coordinator of UC's Racial Awareness Program, said the messages add up over time.
“It starts with small statements, like "You throw like a girl,' and eventually a man will get to the point where he devalues the person he's spending time with, not listening to what she has to say.”
Other campus groups in Greater Cincinnati have developed strategies that not only focus on awareness, but also prevention.
Northern Kentucky, Xavier and Miami universities incorporate the national RAD (Rape Aggression Defense) program. Specifically created for women, instructors are nationally certified, and teach students over 12 hours of the basics of self-protection.
Northern Kentucky recently completed a rape awareness week, “Safer Dates — Shared Responsibilities.” The focus was to teach both men and women dating manners, how to be safe, and male and female communication patterns.
For now, 20-year-old UC junior Lisa Kathumbi says students can make a difference in their daily lives. She analyzes the music and videos she listens to and watches to make sure they are not degrading, and speaks out on the issue when it comes up. But she recognizes that changing behaviors and attitudes that could lead to assaults against women is a lengthy battle.
“You can't erase 20 years of conditioning overnight.”
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