Twenty-five years ago, Marty Huber and Jerry Bain talked about marriage. Marty chickened out. Jerry never stopped loving her.

Second of five parts Sunday: Impact of change is profound Today: Couples wait longer to marry Tuesday: Immigration increases diversity Wednesday: Some couples marry each other twice Thursday: What's the most popular marriage month?

        Over the years, they went to weddings together, celebrated birthdays, talked often. For special events, they were each other's date.

        Marty thought of Jerry as a friend. He knew Marty was the only woman he ever wanted to marry.

        Men and women are waiting later these days to marry — about 4 1/2-years later than in 1979, according to an Enquirer analysis. But few wait as long as Marty and Jerry.

Marty Huber and Jerry Bain. (Glenn Hartong photo) | ZOOM |

        When Marty became sick a couple of years ago, Jerry was by her side. It was the first time she had to ask for help. It was the first time she saw Jerry as more than a friend.

        While Jerry helped her recover, Marty fell in love.

        On Nov. 20, 1999, Marty and Jerry married. It was the first marriage for the Sayler Park couple.

        Marty was 58. Jerry was 57.

        “It was great and exciting and scary to think after all those years, my whole life is going to change,” Jerry says. “I knew she was the only person I ever wanted to be married to ... We've known and gone out together longer than most people are married.”

        Before they even met, Marty sent care packages to Jerry while he was in Vietnam. He was a friend of a friend, and she wanted to pick up his spirits during the year-long tour. She wrote notes on toilet paper, packed potato chips and cookies, and tried to get liquor through. It only made it once, in a little medicine bottle.

        Jerry came back to Cincinnati with a handlebar mustache and a nickname of Yosemite Sam. At his welcome home party, Jerry met Marty.

        They started hanging out. Marty invited Jerry to the opera Faust at the Cincinnati Zoo. They listened to Faust make a pact with the devil between hyena shrieks and monkey chatter.

        They enjoyed each other's company. But Marty wasn't ready to marry. She had taken care of seven younger brothers and sisters after her mother died, and marriage seemed like “jumping from the frying pan into the fire.”

        Her apartment was a refuge, a place of peace where she could escape. After years of caring for others, Marty wanted some of her own time.

        “I always wanted to get married, but that's not something I thought you should push,” Jerry says. “I was willing to wait.”

        Marty says getting sick shifted her priorities. A job wasn't everything, she says. Life should be about relationships.

        “Some people need a little tap on the shoulder to change their lives,” Marty says. “I needed a whole mountain.”

        The two moved gingerly toward romance and eventually marriage. They took marriage preparation classes required by the Catholic church. The priest said the couple had the highest score he'd ever seen on the compatibility quiz.

        Jerry suggested a small, private wedding, with a reception later for friends and family. Marty wanted a big wedding.

        Her six sisters served as bridesmaids, the youngest of which was 35. More than 200 people attended the ceremony at St. Xavier church. They danced and ate roast beef, chicken and roasted potatoes and extended the reception by an hour because everyone was having such a good time.

        One of the perks of marrying later in life was that Marty and Jerry could afford to honeymoon at a luxurious, exclusive resort in Acapulco.

        “I think of (not marrying earlier) as a lost opportunity,” Jerry says. “But you can't go back. And I don't regret waiting. It was worth the wait.

        Marriage has meant adjustments. The couple discovered some people think dishes should be loaded in a certain pattern in the dishwasher while others are more free-spirited.

        “I'll load,” Jerry says, “She'll rearrange it. And I've gotten used to it.”

        A month ago, the couple popped open a bottle of champagne and ate the top tier of their wedding cake. It was sweeter with age.

        And so, too, is love for Marty and Jerry.

        “Having someone there to always share life experiences is fabulous,” Jerry says. “Whether it's mowing the lawn or going to the symphony.”

        For Marty, “The best part is going to bed at night and having someone there to always say, "Good night and sweet dreams.' ”

A love worth waiting for
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