Death, be not proud, because UK fans are prouder.

        Never mind that their beloved Wildcats won't be NCAA champions this year. They can console themselves by selecting their very own Wildcat coffin.

        It's bold. It's blue. It's the latest gimmick from the funeral industry, which can't be satisfied with the fact that everyone dies. No, a steady supply of customers isn't enough — these marketing geniuses have to find ever more extravagant ways to stick us in the ground.

        Behold the college-themed steel box, priced at $2,750, from WhiteLight, a Texas casket company. Using patented technology, it transfers images onto vinyl, then applies the material to the outside of the boxes.

        I have to admit they're striking. Were you one of those fanatics who delayed labor so you could watch the 1997 championship? If so, this is the casket for you.
       

Passionate alumni

        WhiteLight makes boxes covered with Monet and Leonardo da Vinci masterpieces, hunting prints and military-themed collages. There are caskets for race fans, farmers and Cuban expatriates. The golfers' casket is titled “Fairway to Heaven.”

        This year, WhiteLight unveiled its college line: caskets for fans of the University of Kentucky, Texas A & M University and the University of Arkansas.

        The UK box features a montage of images against a royal blue sky. There's Memorial Hall, the Wildcat sports logo, the Kentucky state seal and a statue of a former UK president.

        WhiteLight has targeted 25 colleges known for passionate alumni, company President Pat Fant says. UK's was one of the first to enter production.

        The University of Cincinnati Bearcats, alas, aren't on the company's list.

        “But they must be for some people,” Mr. Fant told me earnestly. “Everyone's school is their own favorite.”

        WhiteLight launched its Art Caskets in 1999 to take advantage of a trend toward more creative funerals. This is a Baby Boomer thing, wouldn't you know.

        “Anything goes,” says Steve Ward of Blackburn & Ward Funeral Home in Versailles, Ky.

        He recently hosted a visitation in which the deceased, a farmer, was laid out near a replica of a John Deere tractor. Because he always requested “just half a cup of coffee,” his family placed just half a cup near his casket.

"I can sell that'

        Blackburn & Ward, 10 minutes from Rupp Arena, is the closest funeral home to Northern Kentucky with a UK casket on display.

        When he saw the item at a national convention, Mr. Ward couldn't resist.

        “I said, "I can sell that,'” he recalls. “I've got several Wildcat fans in my community who will go absolutely ape over that.”

        After six weeks on display, the casket has attracted one buyer planning a service, Mr. Ward said. Nationwide, several dozen have been ordered so far.

        The death biz being highly competitive, I had scarcely begun this column before Batesville Casket Co. was faxing me their own version of the sports-related goodbye.

        The company can engrave caskets or embroider the lining with special sayings. It also suggests props to funeral directors. For instance, the sports casket is shown surrounded by a TV, Super Bowl poster, trophies, pennants and what looks like a La-Z-Boy recliner.

        Well, you know what they say about die-hard fans: They like to rest easy.

       Karen Samples can be reached at 859-578-5584 or ksamples@enquirer.com.

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