Question: Why do we have to “mind our P's and Q's?” Why not our C's and D's? Or L's and M's?

        Answer: You're going to be sorry you asked this. Heaven knows, the Stupid Desk is, because no matter what we say, we're going to get a ton of angry mail.

        Seems there's been a gigantic debate on this for for many, many years. As far as anyone can tell, it was first written in 1779, according to researcher Michael Quinion in a 1996 article on the Internet. His main theories:

        • It's advice teachers in the olden days gave to children learning to write, to be careful not to confuse the lower-case p and q.

        • It's advice to a printer's apprentice, back in the days when they actually set type. The backward-facing metal type letters would be especially confusing.

        • It's advice to a bartender not to confuse the letters p (for pint) and q (quart) when he tallies the bill. Or the “tick” as it was called back then.

        • It's advice to a ballet student to be sure to always perform the dance figures pieds and queues with precision.

        Mr. Quinion, for the record, favors the first.

        If you have a stupid question, send it to knipenquirer@yahoo.com.

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