Jessica Selasky and her mother, Dorothy Lynn, have given more than 100 seminars on public speaking. Last year, they decided to write a book on the topic with tips and observations. Your Public Speaking Workout: Exercise Your Body Parts looks how to generate outlines, details, focus and presence. Ms. Selasky spoke with business reporter John Eckberg about the dynamics of public speaking:

        Question: Public speaking is a horrible prospect for most people. Why?

        Answer: People are just afraid that they're going to look stupid. There was an article in the New York Times that was recently published that found that 40 percent of Americans are terrified of public speaking and that's a real career stopper. People who don't communicate don't get ahead and don't get promoted.

        People are terrified because they are afraid that somebody in the audience is going to know that the speaker doesn't know anything. In reality, the person who is going to make a speech usually knows more about the topic than they need to know.

        Q: Often, when people speak at a convention or seminar, the folks they're talking to are going to be working their way through dessert or salad. They're going to be eating. What can be done to rise above the clinking of the silverware?

        A: When you are doing a dinner, lunch or breakfast meal like that, you have to acknowledge that food is being served. You can't pretend that it's not happening. You have to let people eat. But make your presentation a little more light-hearted. Use a little more humor, more stories. Acknowledge that people are eating but do not be afraid of it.

        A lot of people are intimidated and stutter or stop talking when they hear all that clinking going on.

        What we really preach is to be natural and let your gestures come naturally, that you shouldn't pre-plan gestures. Our teaching goes against the grain. A lot of people who teach public speaking think you should memorize your presentation, write the speech down word for word, write down your gestures, where you're going to do them. We say don't do any of that.

        Q: Why do you break from that tradition?

        A. We believe you don't want to write the speech, memorize it and tell jokes. We're not joke tellers. What you should do is be natural, be prepared and be enthusiastic. If you say big, your hands go to big. You don't have to pre-think that. We really believe in extemporaneous speaking.

        Be natural. Be prepared. Be enthusiastic. Those are the three points we talk about. That's how you overcome that nervousness, too. Those are the three keys.

        Q: I know one of your tips is that if you see attention flagging, announce “Let me tell you a story” and you'll get the audience's complete attention because everybody likes a story. Any other tips?

        A: Yes. Just pause or be silent for a moment. That makes people uncomfortable and will bring their attention back up to you. Also, use humor. Really fantastic speakers are the ones who use humor. Our motto is laughter preceeds learning.

        Q: But isn't humor a risk - that it's not going to be funny? What if it lands flat and nobody gets it?

        A: Yes, it is, and you have to be careful with it. It should be something having to do with the moment.

        Remember that audiences want you to succeed. Every audience wants you to succeed. And they give you a certain amount of time at the beginning of the speech to let you succeed.

        If you're still acting nervous after 30 seconds, maybe two minutes, that's when they'll turn on you.

        Q: Note cards? Yes or no.

        A. Yes, we believe in extemporaneous speaking. You know what you're going to say so we suggest picking out key ideas that you want to get across. Write words on note cards, say, for instance, the word planning. Well, you know what you're going to say about planning so you don't have to write down everything you're going to say.

        Put maybe 10 key points on your card and that's all you're going to need.

        At some point in your life, people have had to make a speech and felt very uncomfortable or your friends made fun of you or your teacher said you should have done this or done that and all of a sudden, the fear is there and it's hard to overcome.

        Visualization is great. Visualize yourself enjoying the moment. We don't want to teach people how to speak in public. We want to teach people how to speak in public and how to enjoy it and be present in the moment. That's our goal.

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