Scott and Valerie Wilkinson of Florence are eager to get the Christmas tree up each year. They and their three children, 17-year-old Sarah, 10-year-old Alex and 8-year-old Andy, each have a role in making the season bright.

        “I do the outside lights with the kids' help,” says Mrs. Wilkinson, “and Scott puts the angel treetop on.”

        A lifetime of memories is refreshed as the children place their ornaments on the tree. Their parents tease and recall the ages of the “handmade heirloom” snowflakes and Santas the kids have created at school.

        Special moments, like tree trimming and the time alone that Scott and Valerie savor in the wee hours of Christmas morning, do more than just preserve tradition. Couples who willingly participate in religious holiday rituals such as decorating the home or lighting candles may be making their marriages stronger.

        According to a recent study, couples are more satisfied with their marriages when they find meaning in shared religious holiday rituals. The findings are reported in the Decemberissue of the Journal of Family Psychology.

        Syracuse University psychologists Barbara H. Fiese and Thomas J. Tomcho interviewed 120 couples who had been married for an average of nine years with at least one preschool child.

        The couples were questioned about their family rituals and about the importance of religion in their families as they were growing up and in their current family. The couples' marital satisfaction was assessed through 32 questions, including “Do you confide in your mate” and “How often do you laugh together?”

        Religion is related to marital satisfaction through the meaning created in shared rituals, according to the study. “The couple's private world of intimate ties and connections often becomes public in the practice of religious rituals,” say the authors, “and the couple may reaffirm their connection and intimacy through the practice of meaningful rituals.”

        Such rituals are often passed down through generations, which plays an indirect role in predicting current relationship satisfaction, according to the study.

        “Although family-of-origin's ritual practices were not directly related to marital satisfaction, they were related to current ritual practices that in turn were related to how satisfied couples were with their marriage,” say the researchers.

        Some gender differences were found; the husband's marital satisfaction was more closely linked to the ritual's meaning and the wife's satisfaction was more associated with the ritual's routine practices.

        Sometimes referred to as the “kin keepers,” wives usually have the responsibility of executing the routine and passing down the practices to the next generation, according to the authors. However, what the husbands felt about the rituals was also found to be an important indicator of marital satisfaction.

        The practice of religious rituals may be just one aspect of how families create meaning in their relationships, according to the authors. “In the context of a changing society in which marriage is a vulnerable institution, religious ritual practices may preserve relationships and serve as a positive template for future generations.”

        The researchers say that the results of their study also highlight the role that religious holidays play in contemporary American life overall.

        “Whereas popular culture paints a picture of religious holidays as a prospect for marketing and materialism, our findings suggest that couples embrace the symbolic aspects of celebrations and value the opportunity to reaffirm their beliefs and relationship.”

Donations trail last year's record pace
Symphony brings holiday spirit home
Train displays, rides seasonal fun
Bradys move into the White House
Marriages made strong by rituals
Author plays 'Dear Abby' to help with holiday challenge
Tips for beating holiday stress
Savvy kids know all about Santa
Tips steer singles into new year