No, you're not the only "person feeling stressed this holiday season. Author Christine Klein offers these suggestions to keep the season bright:

        • Lower your expectations. Your children won't be thrilled with every gift they receive. Some of the clothes aren't going to fit. At least one of the toys won't work. One or more of your relatives will be irritating. And part of the meal will be over-or-undercooked.

        Martha Stewart may be able to pull off a picture-perfect holiday, but she has a cast of thousands (well, at least a hundred) helping her. Expect a less-than-perfect holiday and you might be surprised at how nice it turns out.

        • Plan the celebration that you want, not the one others expect it to be. Ask yourself this question: “If our family could spend the holidays the way we want, how would it be different?”

        It may be too late to alter the course for this year's celebration, but it's a good time to drop hints about your new plans for next year.

        • If you're pulled in lots of different directions during the holidays, carve out some time for a tradition that is all your own. Some examples:

        Drink egg nog and dance to your favorite Beatles tunes while getting ready for the big family bash (like one family I know).

        Bundle up in your pajamas and ride around enjoying the lights.

        Sprinkle bird seed throughout your neighborhood so the birds have a happy holiday too.

        • If you didn't have time to mail holiday cards this year, send Valentine or St. Patrick's Day cards instead.

        You'll have more time to personalize each card, and the recipient will probably appreciate it more, during the less-hectic time of year.

        • Don't forget the reason for the holiday season. Plan to spend time at your favorite place of worship.

        And don't expect the kids to sit perfectly still during the entire service. They probably won't.

        • Insist that your children send a note of thanks to everyone who gave him or her a gift, no matter how small.

        Notes should go to children as well as adults, relatives as well as friends. Anyone who spent the time to make or purchase a gift, or write a check, deserves a written thank-you.

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