Would you like fries with that?

Adam Bush would, but that is not allowed.

The 16-year-old Milford High School junior and three fellow students are doing "ketchup shots" - sucking down contents of small ketchup packets - in a "Lunch Table Survivor" game inspired by CBS' popular Survivor show.

"You have to squeeze the whole thing into your mouth, and swallow it," instructs Josh Pierce, 16, "host" for this fall's weekly cafeteria competition.

(From left) Riley Kurtz, 15, Josh Pierce, 16, and Adam Bush, 16, play Lunch Table Survivor at Milford HIgh School. (Tony Jones photo) | ZOOM |

"Lunch Table Survivor," started 18 months ago, is one of several manifestations of the Tristate's continuing obsession with CBS' reality game show. For the fourth consecutive Survivor series, Greater Cincinnati is CBS' top-rated market for the program.

But not everyone is chugging condiments in devotion to Survivor (8 p.m. Thursday Channels 12, 7).

Some are playing FaheyvivorII, a weekly Internet trivia game by sisters Erin and Brianne Fahey. Their Web site also has a message board, cast profiles and links to Survivor sites.

"We created it because Survivor was a show, for a change, that my entire family enjoyed watching and talking about," says Erin Fahey, 27, a public relations officer for the University of Cincinnati College-Conservatory of Music.

"We were all so competitive that we thought we should make this into a game, and it snowballed into this huge thing," says the Walnut Hills resident. Her North College Hill parents, brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew are among the 32 FaheyvivorII (pronounced "Fay-vivor") players this fall.

Each week the sisters pose a wide - and wild - variety of questions: Who will win immunity? Who will be voted off? Will any Survivor cry this week? Will host Jeff Probst wear a hat? Will a Survivor bleed after the challenges?

Adam Camp,16, won immunity but writes the name of the person to be voted out in "Lunch Table Survivor". | ZOOM |

"They all like the creativity aspect," says Ms. Fahey, who was winning (with 2,175 points) half-way through the game she created. (Hmmm!)

A few weeks ago, the Fahey sisters offered bonus points for the Survivor nicknames. Among the suggestions:

"Geritol Jan" for Chuay Gahn matriarch Jan Gentry.

"Square Head Sponge Robb" for bartender Robb Zbacnik.

"Clay Is Like Play-Doh" for affable restaurateur Clay Jordan.

"Ken Is A Man Named After Barbie" for handsome New York police officer Ken Stafford.

"Everyone got a good laugh out of it," she says.

For Erin McDonald, 27, of Price Hill, playing FaheyvivorII enhances her enjoyment of the CBS series about contestants for the $1 million prize on Tarutao island, off the southwestern coast of Thailand.

"It makes you pay more attention to the minor details," Ms. McDonald says. "Survivor is a mental game - not just for the people on the show, but for the people who play Erin's game."

Both can be humbling.

"I'm doing awful this year," says Ms. McDonald, ranked No. 22 in the FaheyvivorII standings. "My niece (Taylor Hensley) is beating me, and she's only 9."

Ms. Fahey says she's proud to keep the Survivor tiki torch burning in the Tristate, where fans once gathered for weekly parties to watch the show.

But Survivor no longer is the cultural phenomenon it was the first two seasons (2000-01). By the lack of buzz, you wouldn't know that Survivor remains a Top 5 show this season averaging 20.8 million viewers (including about 175,000 here).

"It's difficult to find a place to read about it. I don't see anything about it in Entertainment Weekly or US Weekly," Ms. Fahey says.

Only a few loyal souls continue to gather every Thursday at Allyn's CafÈ in Columbia Tusculum.

"It fills up the bar, and a couple of tables," says bartender Mike Schleich. "We used to have 25 or 30 people."

Even some of the Milford students playing "Lunch Table Survivor" say they enjoy the school game more than the TV one.

"I don't watch the show. I just do the lunch games," says Josh, who was selected "host," or the challenge inventor, by the group for the fall quarter.

Only Greg Lemmon admits to being a big fan. "It's a good show," he says.

His older brother, Ben, helped start Lunch Table Survivor in spring 2001. Back then the weekly winner would wear an immunity necklace made with plastic spoons and forks.

Sitting next to Greg is junior Kim Kaczmarek, 17, who never watches the show.

"I just like doing this," says Kim between ketchup squirts. But when Josh orders the gang to switch to mayonnaise packets, Kim drops out.

"I'm done!" she declares. "I can't take anymore. This is pretty bad."

Pretty bad, but not the worst. Lunch Table Survivor challenges have included drinking vegetable oil shots; or eating hot peppers; toothpaste on saltines; dog food laced with chili powder; and a Crisco-and-horseradish mixture.

"I told 'em it was cream cheese," Josh says with a smile.

Now you know why he prefers being the host. "You don't have to eat a thing, and you can make other people do things," he explains.

On this day, junior Adam Camp, 16, wins immunity by swallowing six ketchups, four mayonnaises and three mustard packets. Then the four players each write the name on a napkin of a person to be "voted off the table."

Josh unfolds the napkins and tallies the votes: One for Kim, one for Riley Kurtz, and two for Adam Bush.

The tribe has spoken.

"I could have beat you," Adam Bush tells Adam Camp, "but I thought I was going to puke. I hate mayo."

E-mail jkiesewetter@enquirer.com