By Shauna Scott Rhone
The Cincinnati Enquirer
Our "empty nest" story on Sept. 12 focused on two families whose frenzied lives were changing to quiet evenings for two.
Both David and Denise Harpring of Anderson Township and Henry and Deborah Saas of Oxford were parent boosters at their children's high schools. Their lives had become as busy as their teens' as they raced for four years from auditorium to arena in support of their children's endeavors. Three months after the kids are gone, are there any effects of "empty nest syndrome"?
David and Denise Harpring hold portraits of their daughters Becky and Amy.
(Enquirer file photo)
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"David says, `empty nest is false advertising,' " reports Denise Harpring. Even though older daughter Amy's at nearby Miami University, sister Becky comes home more often between classes at Butler University in Indiana.
"There was a stretch of four straight weeks in October and November," says Mrs. Harpring, "when one of them would be home for fall break or we were going to see them for parents' weekend."
Quieter house
Right now "the house is definitely more quiet. We've been able to pursue projects and activities that have been put off for years. If we want to go somewhere, we don't have to check the girls' schedules for conflicts. They are learning a lot about life and about themselves, and we are very proud of them."
Daughter Becky has even noticed a difference. "'You guys have changed,' she said. When I pressed her to elaborate on that, she said we seemed more relaxed, more spontaneous, and less rigid.
"If that's what empty nest has done for us, I guess that's not all bad."
Henry and Deborah Saas of Oxford are "deliriously enjoying our empty nest."
The family connects by
e-mail or instant messaging at least once a week.
"They're loving where they're at," Mrs. Saas says of her triplet sons. Tyler's at the Culinary Institute of America in New York, Jonathan's at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and Jordan's at Eastern Kentucky University.
"We are enjoying our time together," says Mrs. Saas. "We're saying `no' more often to other obligations and are doing more things together. Our regular schedules keep us as busy as ever, but we spend our evenings together."
About Thanksgiving?
How do the two families plan to spend Thanksgiving?
"Most family traditions will remain this year," says Mrs. Harpring. "We know, however, that that proverbial clock is ticking. With Amy graduating in the spring, we don't know where she will be next year at this time. It's a real possibility that she will not be able to get home for both Thanksgiving and Christmas.
"I guess it's time to start making our own holiday traditions that involve just the two of us. Ah, that's just another one of those parental growing pains!"
The Saases also look forward to having their collegians home for Thanksgiving, although Tyler's downtime is too short to allow a trip. He's spending the holiday with a classmate and that's OK with his parents.
"You want to raise your children to operate as independent adults and not have to be managed moment to moment," she says.
"This is the year for a new tradition," says Mrs. Saas, like picking and trimming the Christmas tree without the kids.
HOLIDAY ENTERTAINMENT
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SUNDAY PEOPLE
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`Empty nests' still pretty full
REVIEWS
Iris DeMent's songs grow old, but timeless
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THE ARTS
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MCGURK: Film notes
Get to it!