By Mike Ball
Cincinnati Enquirer

Top five

1. Pat Tillman. The former Arizona Cardinals football player has been accepted into the Army's elite Rangers unit. Tillman, who turned down a multiyear offer of more than $1 million a year to join the Army with his younger brother, Kevin, completed basic and advanced infantry training in October. He was certified as an Airborne parachutist in November and graduated from the Ranger Indoctrination Program Friday. Wow.

2. Bengals. It's three days until Christmas - do you know where your second Bengals victory is?

3. The Harlem Globetrotters. In town this week, they have provided good, clean entertainment for decades. Besides, they offer a nice respite from four months of following the NFL's version of the Washington Generals.

4. Bob Boone. The Reds skipper had to be tickled to hear Barry Larkin say he would be open to playing second base. Let's see: Larkin at second, Felipe Lopez at short and Aaron Boone at third. Or maybe Boone at short and Brandon Larson at third? He could bat Lopez leadoff, or maybe Larkin. How about Adam Dunn at first base, with a platoon of Reggie Taylor and Ruben Mateo in left? And that pitching rotation - what, eight, nine, 10 possible starters? A bullpen by committee? The possibilities are endless. (Help us).

5. Lorenzo Neal. A deserving Pro Bowl selection at fullback, an unappreciated position. Wonder which playoff contender he'll be with next season?

Bottom five

1. A Christmas bargain. Seems I have gotten my grubby little hands on some primo Bengals tickets this week, offered up by someone who, surprisingly, didn't want them. Club seats, going price of $159.50. For a 1-13 team? Hey, it's a much better deal than it might appear on the surface. With the coupon on the back, and with the proper purchase, you can get a free chili dog! Seriously.

2. Small-college football playoffs. Georgetown, Ky., Mount Union and Western Kentucky played in national title games this weekend. How can those kids play in playoffs and keep up with their schoolwork? (You know, the way Florida State quarterback Chris Rix didn't.)

3. Michigan State. The Spartans' football program capped a season of suspensions and defections by pirating John L. Smith from Louisville - practically in the middle of a bowl game.

4. The Braves. They gave away Kevin Millwood because of economics? That's the Reds' specialty!

5. Phil Jackson, Lakers coach. Where's that genius stuff now?