Your teenage daughter's team is down by one point with time expired. She's on the free-throw line. She spins the ball once, dribbles and....

The shot misses. Your kid has just lost the game.

At this point, you:

Feel so bad for her that you cry.

Take her shopping as a distraction.

Slap her on the back and say, "You'll get 'em next time."

I'm betting most dads would pick No. 3. But if you're like me - a woman who never played competitive team sports - you waffle between 1 and 2, depending on whether there's a sale at the mall.

Meanwhile, your daughter has already bounced back. She's an athlete, so she has to. She knows losing is part of the game.

"I think girls' self-esteem is higher now than it's ever been," says Tracy Meyer of Park Hills. Her daughter, Leslie King, plays basketball and soccer at Notre Dame Academy. Leslie, 15, has a resiliency and confidence that amazes her mother, who didn't play sports as a kid.

Today, "Girls see themselves differently," Meyer says. "They're winners now."

It's Big E's turn

On Saturday, all the winners of Northern Kentucky - female, that is - are invited to a 1 p.m. women's basketball game at Northern Kentucky University.

Anyone wearing her team uniform or T-shirt will get in free, as will all Girl Scouts and Special Olympians. The event features a shooting contest and T-shirt giveaway.

"We hope we pack the place," says Kim Egan, one of the organizers.

Egan has a deep commitment to the cause. In 1999, her family and others sued the Boone County School District, claiming it was shortchanging girls' softball at Boone County High School. The families didn't seek damages, just equal treatment. They won, and the girls' team now has its own field next to the high school.

It wasn't easy. After the suit was filed, Chrissi Egan dropped out of softball so her presence wouldn't be a distraction to the team.

In honor of her daughter, Egan has since formed an organization called BigE.org, to promote girls' sports in Northern Kentucky. "Big E" was Chrissi's nickname on the softball field.

Saturday's NKU game is BigE's first event. NKU's athletic department is a co-sponsor.

Women are learning

Through sports, kids learn so much: how to compete without taking it personally, how to lose and bounce back, how to work within a team.

Traditionally, men have drawn on these lessons in the workplace, while some women have foundered.

Take, for instance, our instinct to be in control.

"I think women, we want to take on the whole thing," Egan says. "And I think men learn, `No, I'm a guard, that's my role, that's my job.' "

Competitive sports can be just as beneficial for women. Happily, many girls are already there. Go, team.

For more information on Saturday's "Take a Girl to a Game Day" at NKU, call (859) 572-6632.

E-mail kgutierrez@enquirer.com or call her at (859) 578-5584.