By Mike Ball
The Cincinnati Enquirer

The top five

1. Straight "A" tickets. Props to the sponsors and the Reds for the outstanding, long-standing program that rewards kids for their work in the classroom.

2. The Big O. The Sacramento Kings - once our beloved Royals - will honor the great Oscar Robertson today. Tune in to see the Kings wear 1965 Royals uniforms.

3. Bode Miller. Hey, it's freezing, and he's a skier.

4. Spring training. And now for those two famous words: visa problems.

5. Kobe Bryant. Looks like he's answering the "next Jordan" question.

The bottom five

1. Baseball arbitration. Pitcher Mark Redman earned a raise from $300,000 to $2.1 million. He went 8-15 last season.

2. Advertising. Commercials during live action. Players more loyal to sponsors than to teams. But this takes the cake: Steve Williams, Tiger Woods' caddie, will wear a Valvoline Oil logo on his sleeve during tournaments. Vrrrooom.

3. The local Mighty Ducks. We're all for wacky minor-league hockey promotions. But the latest, well, let's just say it doesn't seem appropriate for a franchise that prides itself on catering to families.

4. Radio talk-show hosts. Only those who prefer to talk about Valentine's Day rather than sports.

5. The NHL, LPGA, WNBA and IRL. According to USA TODAY, they all have TV ratings lower than the PBA., a.ka. bowling!