By John Johnston
The Cincinnati Enquirer

Kelly DiMuzio, 17, of Monfort Heights, is one of several women who play Madam Rat Lady (Craig Ruttle photo) | ZOOM |

First off, a warning: You might not want to be wolfing down Wheaties while reading this story.

It's not that we're bent on ruining your breakfast, but this is Halloween, you know.

A good time, we thought, to pay a visit to Madam Rat Lady, one of the most popular characters aboard the riverboat-turned-haunted house known as the USS Nightmare.

A Rat Lady has, uh, "entertained" visitors for the 12 years Nightmare has been anchored at Newport's Riverboat Row. She and the rats occupy a small "cage" with a window for guests to peer in. The Nightmare keeps about 40 small rats on hand; at any given time, about 20 share the space with Rat Lady while the others take a break.

Rat Lady is "the hardest position in the house to fill," says Glenna Rizzo, USS Nightmare manager. "Not everyone wants to sit in a cage with rats." She counts herself among that group.

"Sometimes they come and work a couple days and never show up again, even after bugging me for the part," Rizzo says. "That happened this year."

We rounded up three Rat Ladies for a chat: Kelly DiMuzio, 17, of Monfort Heights, is a senior at McAuley High School and this year's primary Rat Lady. It's a few minutes before show time, so DiMuzio's wearing full makeup - lots of facial wounds, gashes and sores. One of her backups, Jean Copenhaver, 21, of Florence, works at a home improvement store. Amy Harris, 27, of Dayton, Ky., was a Rat Lady last year; for health reasons - she's pregnant - she opted out of the role this year but still works on the Nightmare.

Question: What led you to this role?

DiMuzio: "I like animals. Walking through (as a paying customer), I always thought it would be a cool job to have."

Copenhaver: "They asked if anybody would fill in."

Harris: "Rats don't bother me. So I volunteered in case (the primary Rat Lady) ever needed a night off or got sick."

What do you do when you're in the cage with the rats?

RATS LEAVING

Rats! Only two more chances to visit Madam Rat Lady at the USS Nightmare on Newport's Riverboat Row. Admission is $12. Hours are 7 p.m. to 1 a.m. today and Saturday. Information: (859) 292-2458; www.ussnightmare.com.

DiMuzio: "Just lie around with them, let them crawl on me. They go up on my hair, they'll go around my neck. They go wherever they want to. I'll have them in my hand and they'll stand up and nibble my cheek."

Harris: "The main goal is to keep them awake because they like to go to sleep. I would make sure I was wearing a necklace, because they like to nibble."

Copenhaver: "I've set them in front of my face and they'll climb into my hair, down my back. There's a mirror so (guests) can see them climb on my back."

What did your parents say when you told them you got the Rat Lady part?

Copenhaver: "Are they clean?"

DiMuzio: "They were like, 'Eeeuuw.' They thought it was gross. But they were like, 'Whatever, it's your choice.' "

Harris: "My mom freaked out. She's one of those that does not like the rats. ... I would come home and she would immediately yell at me to get in the shower, because she could smell 'em. The whole situation creeped her out."

Describe your first time in the cage.

DiMuzio: "It was weird at first. But I got used to it. It's fine now."

Harris: "It was really nice because I got to sit down the whole time. My only concern was whether these guys were going to be biters."

Are they biters?

Copenhaver: "They do nibble."

Harris: "I had fake nails, and they chewed them. I got holes in my leather boots from where they chewed."

What's the best thing about being Rat Lady?

DiMuzio: "No one else wants the job."

Copenhaver: "You don't lose your voice because you're not screaming at people. It's a little bit warmer in there, too."

Harris: "And you get to sit down all night."

What's the worst thing?

DiMuzio: "When they start biting you. They'll nibble on you and they like the fake blood, so they'll start chewing on that. It's made out of corn syrup."

Harris: "The smell."

Describe it.

Harris: "It's urine. You're in there for multiple hours with these rats, so they're doing their business in the corners."

And on you?

Harris: "Uh-huh."

Copenhaver: "Oh yeah."

Obviously, rats crawling all over you isn't your worst nightmare. What is?

DiMuzio: "Probably having snakes crawling all over me. I like snakes, but I wouldn't want them all over me. That just freaks me out."

Harris: "Roaches. I don't care for spiders, either. If they had a tarantula cage, I wouldn't be crawling in there. (But) roaches are my main phobia."

Copenhaver: "I hate roaches. I'm like, stomp 'em out! I can sit in a cage with spiders, though."

What kind of reactions do you get from customers?

DiMuzio: "They look at me and laugh. Or go 'Ooooh you're gross.' Or they'll cheer for me because they think it's cool."

Copenhaver: "Most of the time it's 'Eeeuuw!' "

What's the most bizarre thing a customer has said?

Harris: " 'Put it in your mouth.' There was a rat girl a couple years ago who had a fake rubber rat tail, and she'd hang it out of her mouth. Ever since, people assume she was actually putting rats in her mouth. I heard it all last year."

Complete the sentence: At the end of my shift, I know I've been around rats all night because ...

DiMuzio: "I smell like rats. My clothes reek of it."

One thing this job has taught me about rats ...

Copenhaver: "They're not as horrible as most people think. They're really sweet creatures if you treat them right."

Harris: "I'm going to take a couple home at the end of the season. Last year I killed two of them by accident, because you've got to climb in and out of the cage. It upset me. I cried. ..."

E-mail jjohnston@enquirer.com