PARTY TIPS

Here are some socializing do's and don'ts: One trick to remember is your O.A.R. (Observe, Ask, Reveal), so you don't sink socially. Here's how to stay afloat: Observe: The venue, food or entertainment and comment on what you see. Ask: The host or a guest some questions. Reveal: Your ideas, thoughts and plans. Instead of hiding and becoming a wallflower, take a bold new step and find your inner small-talk self. (Source: Susan RoAne's book How To Work A Room.)

By Francesca Donlan
Gannett News Service

They are the scenarios that turn would-be socialites into partyphobes:

"I know only one person here."

"I'm widowed and surrounded by couples."

Everyone can be confident at social events, says Susan RoAne, a motivational speaker and author of What Do I Say Next (Warner Books; $14) and How to Work a Room (HarperCollins; $14).

"Lots of people are shy," RoAne says. "This is daunting. If you find these situations uncomfortable, you are not alone. In fact, you are normal."

RoAne suggests bringing some items of interest from the paper and preparing questions.

"People like to talk about current events," she says. "There's always some trial or controversy going on.

"The banquet of banter is potluck," RoAne says. "You've got to bring something to the table."

She also suggests reaching out to those who look even more miserable.

"The person standing in the corner not talking to anyone is a wonderful person to talk to because they are probably shy," she says.