By John Johnston
The Cincinnati Enquirer

Rick Ingle (left) holds Grace, and Heather holds Isabel. John Wallis (right) holds Isaiah, with Sydney and the other kids in the Wallises' yard.

The house that the Ingle family will be moving into in June. Photos by TONY JONES/The Cincinnati Enquirer

Sydney Wallis and Heather Ingle ran a marathon together. Their families attend the same church. Soon they'll be neighbors on the same North Avondale street.

Something else they have in common is a little more unusual: Ingle, 35, has 10 youngsters at home - five adopted, three biological, two foster children - and Wallis, 46, has 12 of her own - eight adopted and four biological - and another on the way.

The women and their husbands, John Wallis and Rick Ingle, say they are simply following God's plan for them: to open their homes and their lives to children - white, black, and biracial - some of whom nobody wanted.

"I really feel this has been a calling in our life and a gift," Heather Ingle says. "It is an amazing honor that (God) has entrusted us with these great children."

The women also believe it was not blind fate but God who led them to meet seven years ago at a Bible study at Montgomery Community Baptist Church. At the time, the Ingles had one biological and one adopted child. The Wallises, with four biological children, were just beginning the adoption process.

Who's who

A look at how Rick and Heather Ingle and John and Sydney Wallis grew their families. Ingle family • Nicole, turns 12 in July, arrived as foster child, February 1993; adopted March 1995 • Addison, 10, born February 1994 • Shawn, 7, arrived as foster child February 1997; adopted June 1998 • Hayden, 6, born April 1998 • Grace, 4, arrived as foster child October 1999; adopted June 2000. • Twins, Michael and Kel, 3, arrived as foster children March 2001; adopted February 2004 • Isabel, 2, born August 2001 • Twins, 17-month-old foster children, arrived January 2003. (Names cannot be used because they are in foster care.) Wallis family • Jacob, 19, born January 1985 • Evan, 16, born December 1987 • Hadley, 14, born November 1989 • Bailey, 12, born July 1991 • Noah, 6, adopted March 1998 • Cecilia, 4, adopted August 1999 • Isaiah, 3, and Micah, 3, adopted from South Africa, February 2001 • Riley, 10; Avery, 8; Kasey, 6; and Solomon, 5, adopted from Ethiopia, April 2003 • Sydney Wallis is expected to deliver Quinn this month.

ADOPTION HELP

Between them, the Wallis and Ingle families have experience with 13 adoptions, both domestic and international. They want to share what they've learned with others. They formed Abraham's Promise, a ministry that aims to dispel adoption myths, encourage others to adopt and support those who already have. It is not an adoption agency. For information, call John Wallis at (513) 751-1361.

Since then, the couples' support for each other has been unwavering, even as they followed different paths to grow their families.

Heather and Rick Ingle married 13 years ago. Heather, deeply moved as a teen by images of starving Africans, always knew her life would revolve around children.

Rick, 36, didn't need much convincing. Less than a year after their wedding, they became foster parents of a 6-month-old girl whom they eventually adopted. Soon after, Heather became pregnant.

Over the next 10 years, she became pregnant twice more, and they continued to adopt from local agencies. One of their adopted children was born to a 15-year-old mentally challenged mother; two were born to a mother who wouldn't hold and touch them; another has Down syndrome; one of the biological children has a mild case of cerebral palsy.

Difficult decisions

The Wallises, meanwhile, thought their family was finished growing when John had a vasectomy after the birth of their fourth child. Then about six years ago, Sydney attended a Sunday School discussion on the world's unwanted children. After a sleepless night, she told John, 43, she wanted to adopt.

At first he said no. He was about to cut back on his work as an architect so he could attend a Baptist seminary. But he agreed to honor Sydney's wish.

After adopting a biracial boy, the couple decided it wasn't fair for him to be the family's only child of color, so they adopted a biracial girl.

In February 2001, the Wallises traveled to South Africa and brought home two children, each less than a year old. About a year later, Sydney flew to Ethiopia. She returned home with four children, ages 4 to 9, including two sisters who had not seen each other in three years. None spoke English.

The Wallises had been considering another adoption when they learned John's vasectomy had failed and Sydney was pregnant. She will be induced in late June.

A couple of weeks later, the Ingles will move from their crowded Kenwood home to a more spacious house in North Avondale. It is just across the street from the Wallises on South Fred Shuttlesworth Circle.

As their families have grown, so have friendships among the Ingles and Wallises.

"No matter what we had to deal with," John Wallis says, "we could go to them."

Families help each other

Heather and Sydney, neither of whom works outside the home, are especially close. They watch each other's children. They talk every day.

"I'll call Sydney and say, 'Oh my gosh, somebody dumped wipes in the toilet.' But while that's happening, 20 other things happened," Heather says. "We commiserate."

That's not to say they complain. Both couples knew what they were getting into.

"This is a sacrifice we are willing to make," Heather says. "In fact it doesn't even feel like a sacrifice. I feel like I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing."

Ingle is a self-employed insurance agent, which means his income fluctuates. Some weeks, "we are lean and mean on groceries," Heather says, and dinner means another dip into the pancake mix they buy in bulk.

The Wallises know, too, what it's like to eat spaghetti for days on end. But nobody goes hungry. John Wallis still works as an architect, and is a part-time campus minister at the University of Cincinnati. The children do fine with hand-me-down clothes and consignment store bargains.

"There have been times when we haven't had a lot, and (the Ingles) have had a little more, and they've helped us out with food or money, and vice versa," Sydney Wallis says. "It's too bad more people can't live like that. That's why I'm really glad they're moving across the street."

The families joke that they'll build an underground tunnel between their homes.

"We are each other's lifelines," Heather says.

E-mail jjohnston@enquirer.com