Sunday, June 13, 2004

Cicada limericks

This week's winners

The Brood X cidcas are dying by the tens of thousand per day now, but that hasn't slowed you down. We've received more than 800 submissions for our limerick contest. We'll print more winners here and online through the end of this month. The author of our overall limerick favorite wins lunch with members of the Enquirer Editorial Board. Meanwhile, Cincinnati's cicadas have attracted worldwide attention. Bill Geist of CBS Sunday Morning is expected to feature a humor segment of Cincinnati cicada mania today during the last half-hour of the 9-10:30 a.m. newscast. The BBC and Nippon TV and Fuji TV - both Japanese networks - also visited Cincinnati to cover cicada mania.

There was a cicada named Faye
Who flew into high school one day
Though try as she might
She could not read or write
But in "Hiss" tory, she got an "A"!
Jane Rehse

A cicada named Sam always mingles
In treetops with the other cicada singles
He knows he'll never go wrong
Singing his cicada love song
While sporting the colors of the Cincinnati Bengals
Bill Helsel
Delhi Township

My wife proposed something new
"A special meal just for you"
The relationship went south
When the spoon hit my mouth
Whoever heard of cicada stew?
Keith Maloy

There once was a singing cicada
Whose purpose was "dying" to mate ya
But he broke down in tears,
When after 17 years,
He discovered he needed Viagra!
Bobbie Timmers
Western Hills

A cicada who ran out of luck
Was out flying and hit by a truck
He was one in a million or maybe a trillion
But now he's just one spot of "Yuck!"
Jane Eaton
Anderson Township

The cicadas just come here to mate,
They never consider their fate,
They scream when they party,
Get more press than Smarty,
But mostly of dread and of hate.
Marilyn Kay
Delhi Township

There once was a cicada named Sam
Who yearned to be ground into Spam.
After a 17 year wait,
Sam, with mate, met his fate
But now could proclaim, "Spam I am!"
Elaine Rauckhorst

There was a cicada named Marvin
And for stardom he was a starvin'
'Cadas were media buzz
So hip and cool he was
Now in Cin Weekly he writes his own column.
Kathleen O'Neill
Price Hill

There was a cicada named Jeff
Who seemed to be going quite deaf
All of the singing
Kept his ears ringing
It has him feeling bereft.
Sharon Evans

There once was a knight named Sir Cades
Who climbed trees in search of the ladies
After his flirt
The eggs fell to the dirt
And burrowed closer to Hades.
T. M. Taylor

So here's to the jolly cicada
Whose purpose is only to mate -ah!
The future is bright
For only a night
He just goes from Alpha to Beta.
Audrey Deinlein
Fort Thomas

Citizens have right to public records
Fine-tuning the Ohio exit exam
Letters to the Editor
It's your right to know
Does planning at OKI place region at risk?
Cincinnati will be a pacesetter for the nation
Editorial: Stem cell rhetoric is a bit misleading
Editorial: Public Record
Sound bites
Let's Talk: Ethics of embryonic stem cell research
A solution to the stem-cell dilemma
Cicada limericks